Re-connecting after detaching

 

Good morrow peeps!

How does one fill a blank page when they have absolutely no idea what to write about?

And how, pray tell, do these writers and bloggers could pen out their thoughts so seamlessly that ideas just trickled from their head like rivulets of water cascading down one’s bare skin?

Perish that thought.

Really though, my life is so mundane with repetition of similar tasks from 9-5, 5-9 – so unlike other people, I couldn’t really write about anything interesting in my blog. #staresatatravelbloggerwebsite #cryingontheinsidewhyimnotrich

Which is why I gravitate towards fiction writing – fanfiction to be precise. I love writing, and even if my life doesn’t revolve around travelling to interesting places other than aesthetic cafes in my area – I figured why not I channel that creativity into creating lives that my mind conjured? That’s the beauty of writing – you can imagine anything and make it come to life.

Easier said than done though.

The journey to become a mediocre writer is already so frustrating – and my level is like 0.001 % compared to Stephen King or even local writers here in my country.

Heck, even my fanfic might be boring. But looking at the viewers in my Wattpad, I’m grateful there are people out there reading my story.

Fanfic is different from novel writing though both platforms allowed you the freedom to create and fantasized about your characters. Fanfiction in my opinion has a lot of leeway – grammar mistakes? No problem. Incredulous situation that transcends logical explanation? Nobody cares. As long as your story and your “ship” characters are interesting – you won’t have editors breathing down your neck asking why pigs fly.

Though I haven’t encounter something about pigs fly yet.

Respect to editors – must be a headache work to read and re-read again and again.  

But I read a lot of fanfics that are soooo bloody good that I wish they could be published in a book. These are the writers who understands the story and paid attention to detail – so the original story doesn’t deviate much and they managed to maintain the characters psyche while enhancing their talents within a story.

Honestly – again, respect.

I’m enjoying my new journey of becoming a fiction writer. Truth to be told, it’s not as easy as anyone might think. You need to have a broad expense of knowledge (something I clearly didn’t have), a positive attitude (still working on it) and the ability to connect with people around you apart from being stuck in a room of a café and wishing that ideas will magically pour out. For now, I’ll just enjoy the “pigs could fly” imagination kind of thing…

As an introvert, that “connecting” part with people sounds scary – and I made a vow to myself to meet my friends whenever I can. Or whenever they can. Some of my friends had kids already. Gosh, it’s so nostalgic to think that seems like it’s just yesterday we were talking about boys and whining about unrequited love. And now, most of us are married, some climbed the career ladder on top of suffering from back pain. One of my friends left her knee-guard in my handbag. Being in 30’s is fun guys. Everyone around said that “Oh you’re still young.” My mind might be, but my body says nah. And when that happens, I just grit my teeth and smile while my knees are wobbling from too much walking. Shopping in your 30’s doesn’t give you the same dopamine like being in your twenties.

Or is it coz I’m broke most of the time? *cries in bitterness*

So yes, here’s to battling life through introversion and laziness. I feel so detached from everyone lately because I’m trying to create a fantasy world in my mind in order for me to get more creative. But I was wrong thinking that being detached will somehow boost my creativity – so far it has done anything but.

I have detached myself from a lot of things, including nature.

So yes, nature walks can help you get a new perspective (sounds cheesy, like businessman advices – networking is important. And you need lots of means of networking even its with nature).

So yes. Friends. Nature. Everything. Read. Learn.

Pausing to reflect. Being grateful. Trusting the process.

Don’t think too much.

All this are life process that I’m still struggling with. Sometimes, I felt like a newborn baby trying to roll over.

Here’s to finding something you can connect with. To doing things you love. And to fall irrevocably in love with everything surrounding you. Again – cheesy. I’m cheesy when I write. In real life? Not so much. Just ask my husband.

Love you all x